AskMen may get paid if you click a link in this article and buy a product or service. The act of falling in love? That was easy for you and your girlfriend.
The truth is, over time, our feelings in our relationships do change. The sparkly and exhilarating rush of falling in love is not permanent. But that does not mean that this feeling disappears; it simply evolves. The idea that the excitement of a relationship is sentenced to only the first months or even years a couple is together is completely false.
When it comes to a long-term relationship with a partner we ourselves chose, we can maintain the thrill of being in love, and deepen our feelings of passion and intimacy. However, to do this means avoiding certain behaviors, habits, and traps that couples commonly fall into the longer they stay together.
Staying in love means taking the hard road and differentiating from negative past influences.
It means challenging our own defenses and facing our, often subconscious, fears about intimacy. Fighting for a relationship means being stubborn about not getting in our own way of staying close to someone else. Here are six tips that I have found to help couples stand the test of time. The ability to laugh with one another is a true of vitality in a relationship. A sense of humor helps smooth the waters when our interactions become stormy.
How to maintain a long-term relationship
When a relationship gets closer, couples often risk growing apart by closing off to new experiences or limiting each other in certain ways. We have to share time and activities to keep it thriving. Pay attention to what makes our partners happy, their interests, and be careful not to take actions that will restrict that happiness. Show excitement when you see each other, make time to just talk, and be sure to make spontaneous affection part of your everyday life. Small steps, like holding hands and making eye contact, are easy to overlook in the face of busy schedules and responsibilities, but they can be key to keeping love exciting.
Losing yourself in love is one of the biggest threats to maintaining intimacy.
Couples should try to complement and support each other in an effort to become their fullest selves instead of merging together to become something else. Inviting open communication and being receptive to feedback can help us overcome the real obstacles in our relationships. Think about what applies and be compassionate to how they feel.
Never stop pursuing your partner
In this same manner, you should seek to be direct and honest with your own feelings. Be sure to show appreciation, even when gifts and acknowledgment are hard for you to receive.
Being generous will make you feel warmly toward your partner and good about yourself, two elements that keep the spark alive. This is a very well written and touching article.
I think this is a very common and sad part of many relationships. It is sad that people who our first so drawn to each other can drift away because of their own problems that get in the way. This is a very touching and well written article by Dr. Lisa Firestone.
It is sad when people become so drawn to each other,and because of their own problems they drift apart. I think this is common in many long lasting relationships.
Thanks for rating
Thank you Dr. Firestone for a great blog. Its really difficult to maintain a relationship which lasts forever. Though, I have seen so many girls and guys that were in a relationship from years and get married at last.
About the Author. Lisa Firestone, Ph. An accomplished and much requested lecturer, Dr. Firestone speaks at national and international conferences in the areas of couple relations, parenting, and suicide and violence prevention.
Follow Dr. Firestone on Twitter or Google. Related Articles. It is about time I found where I fit Gii Reply.
I need good girl. I need love.
I need love too. The greatest and most important adventure of our lives is discovering who we really are. The reasons we act like our parents may not seem like a great mystery. We all have those moments of frustration with our partner that lead us to act in ways we later regret. Scientists who study forgiveness have long agreed that it is one of the most important contributors to a healthy relationship.