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I left my family and friends behind almost a year ago. My first escape attempt after I began to recognize what I was doing not only to myself but to them.
I fled not knowing my direction clearly, my understanding only being that I was doomed if I stayed my present course. Colorado beckoned with the promise of peace nestled in the frozen Rockies, but it was not destined to hold me. Again I ran and traveled East alone. For the first time I could remember in a lengthy span the night embraced me again like a lost lover cradling me in sightless arms.
You did awaken me from a frozen shell, and for that I am in your debt.
You ed and I answered from the deep hole in which I had buried myself smothering. Until I am cold in the ground I always remember the time I spent safe in your arms. I knew still I was far from healed and played a dangerous game.
Nothing had changed but my geographic location. As I drove the endless of barren countryside, I made a promise to myself to be kept if I was not moving forward in civilian life.
It was an old promise, and the time for redemption had come. I was lacking self discipline, purpose and in need of training.
I would serve again. I ed up for the military.
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